What do u think of this incomplete rap…?

Jarreau Fourie Asked: What do u think of this incomplete rap…?

Hook

Seems like im a VIP at the club of pain
Another ni99a fallen victim to the heartbreak game
Insomnia kicked in sh.itI haven't slept for one week
Yes,It makes one weak….the emotion's looking bleak
So I'm set on the scene of the pain that one has never seen
The intensity rises,as im trapped within the matrix of insanity
Patiently awaiting the moment of sincerity

Verse

Damn words I never said and never will
that's truthful like the words from that alcohol spill
Seems like Heartbreak hotel is where I'm checked in
Seems like the end is just beginnin
Wondering if I'm following ,the pursuit of happiness
Consumed By the darkness and the lifeless
Because the pain is ,infinitely limitless
Yes ,living life with no emotion,no devotion or adoration
Linked to depression by the obscene obsession for affection
Deceived by the intense influential impressions
Controlled by the L.I.V.E and the L.I.V.E.D
Read it backward so that you can see
As I regain a slight amount of consciousness
I find within myself pure loneliness….
Damn who would've thought
A young ni99a writting rhymes would be caught

Is it likely for me to get signed….?????

Answers:



Virtuous2324 Answered:
Great idea putting your lyrics on the internet for someone to steal them – Just saying



Jordan Answered:
Firstly thanks for the advice but you should finish it and make a mixtape too however I hope you got it copyrighted before you find Jay-Z rapping it for you without credit lol It has a good base but as far as professional this isn't in 16 bar assembly.

You just might make it. Hell, lets start a BME thing and crunch a mixtape together once you've got it finished.



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