Ex girlfriend with Borderline Disorder is back again?
Anthony Asked: Ex girlfriend with Borderline Disorder is back again?
Need some advice if anyone out there has been involved with someone with BPD. I was dating my ex for 2 years, and about 3 months ago we broke up after she said she needed a break, only to find out that she had already been sleeping with someone else. A little background. After dating for 4 months, she immediately wanted a commitment as to when i planned on getting engaged and starting a family. I told her if at the end of the year we were still going strong, then we would get engaged. Well this is not what happenned. Right up until our 1 year anniversary. all she did was constantly badger me about getting engaged, moving in together, trying to have kids even though we weren't getting engaged, and so on. And it just seemd as though if she did not get her way each time, she would respond with ultimatims. threats, and sometimes just down right verbally abusive. Well with all this, i put off getting engaged until we could work thru these issues. During which we went to therapy, and that is when she was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. Even though she was, i tried to help her, stay by her side, and go to therapy with her to work thru the issues. Well it didn't help in the least, and just 3 months ago is when she said she wanted a break, only to find out she had already been cheating. Now after all that, and not hearing from her for 3 months, she contacted me again yesterday. Mainly to ask if i was dating anyone, how it was going, and if i was happy. She must have said 5 times she wants to keep in contact, even though i told her it wasn't a good idea. She said she is still with the guy she cheated on me with, and that she is happy, and things are going well. Even though he is 20 years her senior, is away every other weekend to see his 5 children from two other marriages, and he will not move her in with him.My question is this: if she is so happy, why call me now after no contact for 3 months? and why so interested in who i am dating when she left me for someone else? Is this a ploy to see if she can get back with me, or is it just misplaced curiosity? She certainly didn't care too much when she left 3 months ago, and in fact told me at that time that her new boyfriend outshines me in every possible way. Now all of a sudden she is worried about me???So many mixed signals it's hard to figure out.